I was thinking the other night
about my own mortality. I started to have these grim thoughts of my early demise
because my husband has recently purchased a motorbike and would like me to ride
with him. Of course my knee-jerk reaction was ‘not in this lifetime’ and ‘one of
us has to stay alive to raise the children.’ But it got me thinking, as I
approach my half century I wonder about my children. Do I have any little gems
of insight to impart on them? Are there any rules that will help them handle the
ups and downs that part of our everyday existence? The obvious springs to mind
don’t drink and drive, and don’t do drugs.
After giving the matter some thought I
decided that I really do have something to teach them. Unfortunately, I also
realised that as they approach the torment that comes with adolescence the last
person they will listen to is their mother. You remember how your mother did not
understand you and how you were never going to be that lame. I recall feeling
that way in my teenage years, so why should my children be any different. And
so I have chosen to share the things I have learned with you, in the hope that
my insight might be helpful, or humorous, to someone. So for what it’s worth
here are my nine nuggets of wisdom.
It’s your life.
You are responsible for your own happiness. You make the decisions regarding
your own life. Obviously if you choose to do drugs then your life will go down
the tubes. But it is more than that. You choose the kind of man you marry. You
choose who will be your friends. Are your friends the kind of people who are
happy for you? Will they cheer when you meet someone special, or will they
resent your happiness?
Choosing the people who share your
life is one of the most important decisions you can make, so it’s okay to be
Careers. You are
expected to choose a career path by the time you go to college. The trouble with
making such an important decision when you are young is that as you grow you
change. Everything about you will change, your priorities, your outlook, your
goals, and your dreams, and most of your interests will change too. Something
that challenged you at twenty might lose its lustre by thirty.
And so, my advice to you is this, follow your heart and allow for change. When you
decide what kind of career path to follow think about your working day will it
be a long, drawn-out grind while you pray for death? Or will it spark your enthusiasm?
Remember whatever you choose it does not have to be
for a lifetime, it’s just for now. You can change your mind down the
Remember to take a
moment in everyday just for yourself. Do this even if it’s only for a few
minutes. It could mean taking the time to have cup of coffee or a bubble
Just take a few minutes every day to enjoy yourself and be alone with your
Treats. A good
indulgence is the perfect pick-me-up for a bad day. We all enjoy treat like
chocolate, and chips, and ice cream, but remember, even if you are naturally slim eating too much sugar and too much fat will always come back to haunt you.
I believe you should treat yourself
every day because constant denial will only make you miserable. Just do it in
People come in all shapes and sizes and very few of us look like models or
Hollywood stars. Most of us get the odd pimple or have hips that accentuate our
ability to bare children. That’s just fine.
A woman is at her most beautiful
when she is confident and happy. Accept and appreciate your body, it works hard
Don’t diet, unless
your weight is endangering your health. Eat when you are hungry. Dieting
makes you conscious of every little bite of food you put in your mouth. Diets
are all about denial, and once again will only make you miserable. If you must
lose weight chose a program that focuses on healthy eating.
Don’t go on a fad diet, you may
lose the weight but in all likelihood you will gain it back again, and that
will just damage your self-esteem.
Never trust a man
who says “Trust me.” You can trust him to get you pregnant or give you an
Any man who tries to get you to
ignore your intuition and do something that you know is not in your best
interests is not worth your time.
Laughter. If you
are lucky you will marry a man who makes you laugh.
Not only is laughter the best
medicine but it will get you through all the hard times and trust me everyone
has hard times. There is simply no way to avoid them.
And lastly and most
importantly, Respect. The only person who has to like you is you.
If you don’t like and respect
yourself no one else will either.
Those were my nine rules that I
wanted to share with you. Oh and of course I nearly forgot, always wear clean
underwear in case of an accident. That is a little gem my mother taught
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I'm currently writing a novella which will be included in a multi-author boxed set, due to be published in February 2019